February to April seems to be a hard time for me since after effectively not writing during that period last year, it looks like the same thing happened this year too. Except I also took a break from BJJ.

The Absence

After going only twice a week during holidays in February I didn’t go at all for another two weeks. I had many reasons — a looming knee injury, tiredness, a sudden urge to play NBA 2K15 for hours… But I think it was all just part of the Blue Belt Blues: failing hard at trying new things, bored by the old ones, no success whatsoever in competitive rolls.

I considered forcing myself to go a couple of times, hoping it would jump start me back — but never did. It was probably the right thing to do; sure enough after two weeks of sitting out, the itch was coming back. I started to fight people in my dreams, i missed the camaraderie. So on the first night nothing felt wrong, I just packed my shit and went. Of course I got a few funny looks and questions from the regulars :-).

The Comeback

I expected to spit out my lungs, get destroyed and end up crying in corner. Somehow, I made it through warm up without too much pain and enjoyed the lesson. Then came sparring time. Since my knee was hurting again and I expected a beating, I decided to go hard… and it went amazingly well.

Even more surprising, I’ve been able to stay that assertive ever since. Feeling competitive during rolls has always been a problem for me, but not really anymore. As a result, i’ve had good success tapping people I usually square up pretty evenly with. The only exception to that is Fred, who now destroys me more than ever. Hopefully I will catch up again soon.

Anyway, it feels great to be back on the mats. I realized how much I missed the people and the sport. Even though my knees are giving me concern, I’m easing myself back into th rhythm.